On the Other Side
- Dan Hoeye
- Aug 3
- 3 min read
“Everything you’ve ever wanted is just on the other side of fear.”
~ George Addair
I woke up one day a few years ago and realized that many of the things that prominently defined me once were no longer part of my current and were not going to be part of my future. It was an astonishing discovery that sent me into a dramatic, downward spiral of depressed confusion. Life had become swampy, and I was really quite lost. After some time and a great deal of processing, I came to accept the losses, and I started rebuilding. It wasn’t as easy as all that; the loss was heavy, and starting over isn’t easy. But I’m just selfish enough, just stupid enough, and just (barely) brave enough to believe that my life, happiness, and success are my responsibility, giving me the power and authority to make of it what I want and need it to be.
Since then, I’ve been in a bit of a renaissance. I made a list of things I want to do, achieve, and become, and a list of things I want to give up, lose, and change. Two lists. I’ve been working on my health, for instance. I regularly exercise now and am purposeful in what I eat. I’ve lost a lot of weight, am more active, and feel better than I have in 20 years. I made a list of books I want to read, got a Kindle, and put aside time to read at least one book a month. Halfway through 2025, I’m about a dozen books in, and my thinker and imaginator love it. I journal now, every day (for real). It’s awesome (for real). I started a blog with no plan of what, how, or why, and it’s been surprisingly good for my soul. I adjusted how I approach faith and others and feel closer to the heavens. And others. I reaffirmed my love and relationship with my wife and children and am more resolute about connecting and serving them individually and collectively, and they haven’t given up on or left me, so I guess it’s working. Every bit as important, I intentionally let go of a number of pains, angers, activities, and even some relationships. My head and heart are much lighter and brighter. Oh, and I bought a motorcycle.
Nearly one year to the day after buying my bike, I’ve just returned from a three-week, 2,500-mile solo motorcycle ride. I desperately hope the experiences and lessons learned stay with me for a very, very long time. Three weeks of country roads, small towns, farms, local diners, and roadside motels slowed me down and sped me up. I read two more books and listened to dozens (hundreds?) of hours of music and podcasts. I journaled. A lot. I thought and processed. About a lot. It really was my own Walden Pond experience, but on two wheels.
After a year of planning, I was exceptionally nervous to leave, and literally up to the moment of actually riding off, I wasn’t sure I was going to. “What was I thinking?” is what I kept thinking. Just on the other side of fear is, perhaps, that which we want and need the most: the things we pick up and the things we put down.
I’m on the other side now.
Beautiful!! Thank you!!